Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
