I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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