I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
