Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
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That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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