did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I have feelings that need drinking.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
