We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
