My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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