it wasn't lemon gatorade
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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