Who did Billy Mays play for?
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
