She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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