I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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