i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize