college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
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I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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