When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
