he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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