I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize