He asked me if I "almost moaned"
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize