He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
