Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
