I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
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If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
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it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
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