i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
