Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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