I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize