Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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