He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
