He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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