He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
How many fucks given?
0.12846
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
