My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
