Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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