Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize