U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Randomize
