You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
