About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize