If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I think my fart just growled at me.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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