Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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