Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize