Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
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