he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
