i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Randomize
