Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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