So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
wow bdsm is so cute
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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