I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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