I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
It's rum buckets o'clock
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
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