Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
