Non-Jews are for practice
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
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