Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I want to be your penis for a week.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
