we're blogging at a bar
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
We need a shit load of segways right now
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
