There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
