More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
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