i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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