i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
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