her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
