just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
So gin and wine won't be happening again
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
